Happy Endings and Unfinished Stories

I remember when I was writing All I Want and I wrote a blog/entry about knowing what I would do with a relationship if I found one.  I compared my hunt to my dog Sammie’s hunt for lizards.  She spends hour after hour, day after day, on the hunt for lizards.  Now, I’m quite sure I know that Sammie DOESN’T know what she’s going to do with that lizard if she finds it. 

Much like I didn’t know what to do with my relationship when I found it.  Or it found me.  Or we found each other. I can’t say we met and fell in love because that’s not how it happened.  In a very When Harry Met Sally kind of way, we had known each other for awhile before the thought of a relationship even crossed our minds.  And I’m not sure it ever really crossed our minds. 

I remember one night thinking, “I think he wants to kiss me.” 

And a couple nights later, he did.

I’d like to add the old cliche’ in “and we were inseparable ever since.”

But, I can’t.  We were inseparable before that, our relationship simply was. 

We did go through that rose colored glass phase, the wart phase, and the Alisha’s freaking out because she’s in a relationship phase. (Yes, that is a phase….one that has caused the tanking of several relationships)

That’s also the same phase as “Alisha’s In A Relationship and Doesn’t Know What to Do With it Phase.”

Luckily, with a lot of communication, compromise, and ALOT of patience, we’ve been able to make it through my neurotic phase as well.  Well, until the next one pops up. Which one would that be?  Hell if I know, I don’t think I’ve ever made it this far in a relationship.  This is a WHOLE new ballgame for me.

Cowboy made me think of my book again.  He just loves it that he has a starring role, and he brings it up every now and then. He asked if my bf had read the book.  I was like, “Ummm….No. I really don’t think he wants to either.” And considering the content, I’m probably right.

Cowboy said I needed to add my bf into my book to give it a happy ending.  For a while, I thought about it.  But, while I was pondering it, Cowboy said to the bartender, “There are no happy endings, only unfinished stories.” 

The more I thought about it, the more I realized how profound that statement was.  How much like it was like one of my favorite lines in any novel was, “All endings are actually beginnings” or something like that from The Five People You Meet in Heaven.

I thought about it while we were at the bar. 

I thought about it when we went to Cowboy’s to meet Cowboy.  When I thought of how I had gone to meet Cowboy there because I had such a huge crush on him.  When he had put his arm around me and I wondered if it meant something.

When I dancing with my bf (I really need to come up with an alias for him).  And watching Cowboy dance with other girls. 

When we had to keep our friend from going to get “Buckethead”.  (That’s a WHOLE other story.)

I thought of how right he was.  I can’t say that there was a happy ending with Cowboy.  There was never an ending.  The story simply changed.  It’s unfinished.

Just like me and my bf are unfinished.  A happy ending is still an ending.  And we haven’t ended.  Just like me and Cowboy, our stories have simply changed.

Happy beginnings?  Yes.  Happy adventures?  Yes.  Happy lessons learnd?  Yes. Yes. Yes.

But happy endings?  Definitely not.

Maybe there are no happy endings, maybe they should be called happy beginnings.

“All endings are also beginnings. We just don’t know it at the time…”….from The Five People You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom.

For now, I’m off to do some more writing.  Who knows, maybe it’s time to dust off that query letter for All I Want and submit it one more time.  🙂

Peace, ya’ll!

I’m out!

Sharpening The Knife

After a three year hiatus from a serious relationship, I’m finding that navigating the waters of new relationship to be a bit of an adventure.

Being single definitely has it’s advantages.  You answer to no one.  You get the whole bed to yourself.  You get to learn about you and what you want. 

But, I’m learning that being in a good relationship has it’s advantages too.  You have someone to laugh with, to share things with, and you get to continue to learn about yourself and what you want.

But, like being single, it’s not all rosy.  What happens after that initial glow rubs off?  When you start to see the warts, when you have your first fight?  That’s when the REAL adventure kicks in. 

I was talking with a friend of mine recently, sharing some of of my frustrations when he asked me, “Alisha, have you ever had a knife?”

I look at him with my puzzled pug look, “Of course I have.  Why?”

“Has that knife ever gone dull?”

“Yes.”  I’m still confused.  I have no clue what this has to do with my relationship.

“Alisha, sometimes you have to sharpen the knife so it continues to work.”

And just like that it made sense.  Sometimes you have to sharpen the knife of your relationship.  After that initial rush wears off, it can get dull.  It’s up to the two of you to do what needs to be done to sharpen it back up.

How do you sharpen it? 

Commitment

Cooperation

Communication

Having a sense of humor and a willingness to inject a little wackiness into the relationship seems to work as well. 

After all, I wouldn’t be me without a little wackiness. 🙂

For now, I’m off to enjoy a little rest and relaxation.  This wacky girl is tired. 

Here’s to new adventures and “sharpening the knife”!

Cheers!

I’m out!