The Songs of My Life #10

#10 “Scars” by Papa Roach”

One of my good friends gave her students an assignment last year that had me salivating. The students were to create the soundtrack of their lives. They started with selecting songs that represented different parts of their lives then wrote short essays explaining their choices. I so wanted to be in her class! Lol. Combine music AND writing? It’s Alisha’s idea of nirvana. Well, that and Orlando Bloom, Johnny Depp, and a can of whipped cream (or two), but I digress. As usual.

Since then, I’ve wondered what songs I would pick. I know I have a few in mind, but where do I begin? Do I begin in the beginning with “I was born”? Should I start at the end and work my way back? Or should I write in true Alisha fashion and bounce from song to song, time period to time period?

How about I begin with the present and start working my way back. And if I want to bounce around, well, I’ll just bounce around. It’s my writing. I’ll bounce if I want to.

I’ll start with “Scars” by Papa Roach.

“Alisha, can you……”

“Mom, I need…”

“Alisha, will you….”

“Mo-o-o-m, are you going to….”

“My weakness is that I care too much.”

I love to help people. I have taken in people who have no place to go. I’ve given money to people on the street. I’ve taken in just about every stray that’s crossed my path, human or animal. I’ve listened and tried to solve more problems than I can count or should be humanly possible.

What I’ve come to realize lately is when you become everyone else’s solver of problems, it leaves you with little time or energy to solve your own. Especially when some (not all) of those people who so depend on you to solve their problems or be there for them are not always there when you need someone yourself. It can become very one-sided.

“Go fix yourself.”

I’ve had a few days off lately and had some time to do some serious thinking. And sleeping (being everyone’s Superwoman can become exhausting.) I played hermit crab for two days. I realized that I’ve been giving too much of my energy away to those that don’t deserve it or don’t give back. And it’s something I’ve done all my life. I’ve got to let these people “go fix themselves”.

“I’m sorry but I’ve got to move on with my own life.”

This is the time for Queen Alisha. It’s time for me to be selfish. Time for me to take care of myself for a change. Time to concentrate on me and those that take time to take care of me in return. It’s time for me to get on with my own life.

It’s time.

Here’s to Papa Roach, “Scars”, and Queen Alisha

Cheers!

I’m out!

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